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“The Batman” Official Thread

  • Thread starter Thread starter Auad
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Does this movie actually suck...?




thats-a-bingo.gif


 
Batman isn't really zeitjest post covid. Dr Strange is the future. Flash has 6 seasons of mind bending crazy shit and batman can't even have a superpower. Time for Bruce Wayne to buy an island. 

 
Batman is just "unfilmable."

Go too real and he's a boring stiff in hockey pads and BMX gear like in the Nolan trilogy and this turd.

Go too "comic booky" and he's a campy retard like Adam West or the Schumacher movies.

There really is no happy medium.  The other super shit gets a pass cause it's CLEARLY fantasy based; but Batman asks us to suspend disbelief enough that a regular guy is just running around with a fucking cape trailing after him and a giant cowl over his head muffling his hearing and obscuring his sight, but somehow he's gonna beat guys up and jump off rooftops.  It's just too ridiculous.

Superman, Spider-Man, Captain America...they all have POWERS.  Even Iron Man works cause it's essentially sci-fi.   But Batman deosn't "work."

I still like the 1989 Batman, but that's "Batman" in name only.  I just like the aesthetics, really.  The story was always shit and the characters are all wrong.  Keaton plays an interesting weirdo, but he's NOT Bruce Wayne/Batman.

I still think Batman only works in comic books and animation, like Batman: The Animated Series.  We're more forgiving of ridiculous stuff in comics and cartoons.

 
I really think they should be able do it though. They just don't want to. The Punisher or the Preacher style. I just think they need to blur the lines of morality more. The Batman should be more sinister and like Dexter. Stealth kills and leaving bats in bad guys mouths. And Bruce should be more like Epstein. But that's not the CIA's agenda with the superhero movies. It's all American propaganda. Good versus evil. Black versus white. Bane is the real hero in the Dark Knight Rises. 

 
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Batman is just "unfilmable."

Go too real and he's a boring stiff in hockey pads and BMX gear like in the Nolan trilogy and this turd.

Go too "comic booky" and he's a campy retard like Adam West or the Schumacher movies.

There really is no happy medium.  The other super shit gets a pass cause it's CLEARLY fantasy based; but Batman asks us to suspend disbelief enough that a regular guy is just running around with a fucking cape trailing after him and a giant cowl over his head muffling his hearing and obscuring his sight, but somehow he's gonna beat guys up and jump off rooftops.  It's just too ridiculous.

Superman, Spider-Man, Captain America...they all have POWERS.  Even Iron Man works cause it's essentially sci-fi.   But Batman deosn't "work."

I still like the 1989 Batman, but that's "Batman" in name only.  I just like the aesthetics, really.  The story was always shit and the characters are all wrong.  Keaton plays an interesting weirdo, but he's NOT Bruce Wayne/Batman.

I still think Batman only works in comic books and animation, like Batman: The Animated Series.  We're more forgiving of ridiculous stuff in comics and cartoons.
ET You really need a good lay by some young jap before you leave for Ohio.

 
I really think they should be able do it though. They just don't want to. The Punisher or the Preacher style. I just think they need to blur the lines of morality more. The Batman should be more sinister and like Dexter. Stealth kills and leaving bats in bad guys mouths. And Bruce should be more like Epstein. But that's not the CIA's agenda with the superhero movies. It's all American propaganda. Good versus evil. Black versus white. Bane is the real hero in the Dark Knight Rises. 




You're clearly very unfamiliar with the fundamental concepts of what's made the character endure for the last 80s years.  I can point you to some great reading material if you'd like to learn more.

Why watch it then?




Eh.   Why does a dog lick his own balls?

ET You really need a good lay by some young jap before you leave for Ohio.


Yes.  Yes I do.  More than anything in the world.

 
You're clearly very unfamiliar with the fundamental concepts of what's made the character endure for the last 80s years.  I can point you to some great reading material if you'd like to learn more.

Eh.   Why does a dog lick his own balls?

Yes.  Yes I do.  More than anything in the world.
Do the japs and younger japs, have a version of tinder?.

 
You're clearly very unfamiliar with the fundamental concepts of what's made the character endure for the last 80s years.  I can point you to some great reading material if you'd like to learn more.

Eh.   Why does a dog lick his own balls?

Yes.  Yes I do.  More than anything in the world.
Which comic books are the main ones?

I think I know about the early comic Batman and Dark trajectory based on Dark Knight comic., but things have changed. Batman is on the wrong side of history and dark isn't cool anymore, zoomers think Batman sucks because he has no powers. But it's hard to do Batman in a movie, I liked Burton's first Batman that's all I need. A Batman movie with a Prince soundtrack. Jack Nicholson is the best Joker. 

 
It seems like superhero movie audiences ruined movies because they are so easily manipulated by and marketed to by Hollywood execs. They are a sure thing with the fans patrolling the artistic decisions. The comic book background is like a built in road map. So they know what will sell, what has worked, so no chances need to be taken. And finally you get just the silhouette of a Batman movie. It looks like it should from a distance but when you look closer it's a mirage. The marketing plan comes before the script. 

 
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